Esoteric Online

Willing and choice are not one, whoever utilized the will, they did not come home from the candy store, their faces ashen and their backs slumped with exhaustion ‘I willed and willed -turning the corner- I found a glorious cul-de-sac, found I had to will some more!


In the statement ‘do as you will, love under will’ any election is secondary -in the act of will- thus this is not the demand for total freedom, but consider the problem of morality.


One may look at certain gross acts, clearly they see these acts are willful and harmful, that becomes the root of any morality -it will never stop at this however- the world is not black and white, if one dies it is not enough to say ‘murder!


These judgements build and build, that refinement cannot be contained -nor should it be- if it were there would be inevitable injustice, for any action that doesn’t fall in clear distinctions -even if the consequence is mere social judgement- the failure of morality is rooting within this structure, it is bound to a chaotic and unstable ground.


The only thing giving apparent root, this is the act of tradition -as a mere repetition- taken as in the commandments, or any other system of primary rules (one may look at these rules, without finding a true integral structure, they simply make-up some basic ideas of living well) that system then expands, the core is not fundamentally whole (as in scientific literature -creating such objectivity!- precision of definition is not enough -one continues to rest on the label- the idol dominates the decision making) knowing a word or action, one instantly assumes the meaning.


General coincidence with structure, such a thing gives presumed validity, but every falsehood rests upon a truth (the eternal extends through the infinite -as Kierkegaard pointed out accurately- one sees a glimmer of the eternal -then they keep on going!- failing to extend through the infinite distorts) thus I use ethic as a differentiation, from the decadence of morality -the root being decay- but Christianity showed its decadence long ago -which is a dynamic statement- anything that does not move beyond the infinite, it is bound to decay, as energy is ever shifting.


Feeding on dual knowledge, one is bound to death, but the eternal is always present -else it wouldn’t be eternal would it?- there is a sickness unto death, but what dies that distorts the vital?


Without any recourse to a root, any idea may be twisted into a morality (as may be seen in the hammer -revealing an amusing failure with women- one of the primary writings -that would be comical if it weren’t genocidal- behind the fervor of witchhunts) it may be seen in the willful lies of raw foodists (destroying the nutrients of foods -stock and jus say otherwise- but what if I cut an orange -the juice running down my hand is lost nutrients- woah for the blade and source of evil!) eating food is an act that diminishes nutrients, without allowing the body full access -further assuming survival as the leveled reality- is this a world of abundance, nutrient counting!


Oh my, we’d best take everything for ourselves, never mind the lies -don’t the ends justify the means?-!


The best one may do, is to say that only a basic morality matters, but this only holds while people listen, do we understand our own emotions however, what is it to will?


To return, I should go to a time capsule, to see if I truly did disgrace myself -in the ignorance of an earlier view- even despite mocking disdain, for a singular victory of depth -but all is fair in love/war and sports?-!

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Comment by Loki on August 9, 2016 at 5:51pm

I do not wish to find a best fit, one may change themselves, thus becoming a better fit -identifying themselves as the shifting piece- as self-awareness arises it is through the part -as the mental construct- this is precisely a leveling, one becomes the puzzle piece, bound within the puzzle.

What one seeks are pieces, that define themselves every moment and every day -nothing is fair and given- nothing is proper as such, simply by being the proper piece (all is earned every moment, nothing is fairly given, neither for the current or past proper) to shift and seek the proper fit is for comfort, but that comfort is now trapped (I shifted to make myself proper, it is only right that others do the same, peace arises through contrived civility) peace from this is a fragile allegiance; true peace demands independence of each, for any who are bound destroy peace -personal experience!- don’t rock the boat and fear creates respect.

The proper fit is the modern matrix, it is decadence (the truth is that the very idea -proper- was created and there is no creation -after having fit the puzzle- thereafter there is mimicry and repetition) each binds through mutual slavery, the infinite becomes rigid, the essential fades from sight.

Pizza/burger/cinnamon bun, from this comes infinity: rolling the dough one makes three varieties -the classical cinnamon bun- as best sellers become staples; layering rolled dough with butter, one makes flaky biscuits, for breakfast sandwiches; other pastry comes, cinnamon bread pudding/apple pullovers/strawberry strudel; altering from the sponge, white bread with herbs or burger buns, only pizza dough is uniquely made; burger patties are ground fresh, with house ketchup/ranch/relish, adding basic prepped items; three patties are made, fish/beef/corn and bean cheeseburger; three burgers include a staple/special/choice; ham is cured several days, then smoked for pizza -the meat topping- along with ground beef; some pizza is rolled to order -thin crust- some rises for hours as deep dish -size/topping quantity raise price reinforced by limited availability- some has crust rolled with cheese; three sauces exist as tomato -fortified by house ketchup- ranch sauce and garlic infused olive oil; within the sauce/crust are three options, staple/special/choice; extra items feed off the primary, house croutons/lettuce/ranch, these combine to base a salad; left over pizza dough is left out, fermenting to make flatbread -fresh pizza dough made freshly that night- stockpiled each day for weekend specials; two day old meat -marinated in reserve cambro containers- are used along with day old prepped vegetables and bread -in addition to half of meals- making take-out sandwiches and staff lunch.

The bakery is simple (two basic doughs with some variation, one basic sauce with variation, basic knife work) the burgers are simple (two patties and a fillet -with simple spice mix and forming- three basic sauces with variation, prep work) the pizza is simple (combining various preparations to reduce work load, while altering final prep for diversity) one restaurant may substitute mornay sauce, another uses a variety of relishes, another has soy sauce for various vegetarian burgers, from three options spring and infinity.

Today one enters a food court, they see infinity and it is all the same, the restaurant attempts to carry infinity -!- or it carries tradition in many cases -!- and how much is the same -Julius would be pleased or disgruntled!- what restaurants are restoratives, woe for tradition!

The proper fit -it is a mantra of the modern classic- no matter how comfortable, it remains a decay of the infinite, and a veil of the essential, to shift to the proper only lightens the weight, thus it weakens the necessity to move beyond.

As the core necessity is lost, the extensive possibility becomes a mirage (these words belong to a hidden master, Nietzsche would say that you could never see him, the reverse of the statement is also true) thus the statement of the decadent ‘your life is far better than so many -or your life would be better if you fit!- so you shouldn’t speak about this failure, it isn’t proper!’ this is a worthless statement (for the level of decadence is all that shifts -success and failure within this- both are aspects of the same decay, that of the essential human lost in the leveling collective) becoming the proper fit has leveled the individual.

One need not recognize the individual, for they accurately fit their labels -as Kierkegaard said- probability then replaces possibility, for the fit is what creates, the individual merely creates what is proper!

Act for what you honor, this is what matters and sustains life, for the proper fit is a mirage, in no instance does the group of individuals fit properly (the only thing achieved is communication of professionals, detached and naively objective, or strained phases to fit the mold) only when the proper mold is broken, only then does true engagement arise.

The proper mold works, in a stagnant world (but the natural world is flowing -when the proper is continual growth- the proper mold works in a world that must decay, it cannot fit the mold and is gradually cut out) acceptance of the mold is blindness, for none fit the mold but adapt.

One creates harmony, by extending out from themselves, as a point of integrity, the self is a focal point -not absolute definition- one must then reject the proper.

Moving through the kitchen (McDonald's -?- I think not) I look and spin about ‘where the hel is it?’ necessity dictates the form shifts -gradually remodeling the kitchen to fit function- but after continual misplacement -one makes the decision- seeking to find a proper place!

The proper is something to move beyond, this means one must move through it, a proper place shifts, for the pattern is in flux, a place for a time.

An update:

I won't be able to post the possible advance, until it has become integrated, despite startling events, I cannot speak of it until I have moved through.

A response to an emanation:

Regret is an illusion, built out of a perception of time, that views in a single linear way -otherwise- there is only the demand to develop.

Comment by Loki on August 8, 2016 at 7:02pm

Making cookies and chocolate cake, the only use for chocolate chips -right beside the small mixer- in an empty space placing a container -minimizing movement- having moderate batches of all needed ingredients, minimizes lifting and replacing heavy bins (all movement must be minimized, every motion has maximal effective action, developing increased pace and efficiency) the core is the truth of efficient movement, in decadence the result is laziness.


Cutting away at laziness -for all know this is an evil- one merely cuts away a hydras head, the core of truth remains -the hydras heads regrow two fold- it cannot be destroyed for it is a basic truth, only attacking the evil is useless, the core must be recognized and developed.


Exercise routine: 30 boxes varying in weight, from 15 to 40 lb; enter boat squat and lift, exit boat raising weight, squat and drop with 30 reps; 5 sets of steps, raising weight on carrying, 150 reps; empty trip quick step down long steps, quick step down ramp with sudden stop and jump, jog stretch of boardwalk with 30 reps each; squat and lift weight, 30 reps; 5 minute break in middle, drink water and eat for metabolism (one must deepen/extending the perception -beyond the view of what is- beyond the activity of stock day -else the activity is poor and damaging- activity breeds activity but precise practice makes excellence) exercise integrated two times per week; garbage day provides further exercise -beyond monotony and disdain- focus moves beyond unwillingness, as one exercises three times per week.


Without diversity, time is lost to specific and pure action, every action must be maximal -minimizing movement- this creates the freedom of time, deepening vitality and thus avoiding injury -through the power of the body- moving through a hike, squatting under a branch (performing one leg squats -having come to a sudden drop- one leg holds the weight, dropping down and moving to full extension on the other leg) is a thing only what it is on the surface?


The goal is not to make every motion exercise -or any other absolutism unless elected- it is simply to sprinkle variety into motion (so that, one exercises for seven minutes a day -common sense to many but the exploration is personal- or they do so three times a week) every moment is more than it is perceived, what is taught and reinforced throughout education, then continued in the workforce, a self-reflecting spiral, it levels all things to the gross alone.


Then one must be lazy -therefore an evil- but one is never lazy, they perform actions that are lazy -decadence spirals as the hydras heads overcome- one is never the label such as whore, the emanation comes ‘well I’m just a whore right?’ (one would hope so on occasion -it is not to discount facets- teasing/play/empathy/attraction -simply breaking beyond one’s traditional limits- but I have only so much space and use too much!) but we know and speak to one another of our labels -even understanding the label is partial- breaking a whole entity into a sliver.


Then what is the core of anger -perhaps decaying into hatred?- the world begins without peace (massive tectonic shifts creating great upheavals, regardless of the degree this is fairly common view, along with sudden and massive loss of life) within the hatred and terror (even as low level terror ‘what if I lose my job -how will I pay for my child’s education?- could my children be taken away?) within apathy or greed, are there core truths that endure?


Respect, this does not come through fear, it comes through self-respect -is that self-respect easy or harsh- perhaps the goal is not rejecting, but turning the force of emotion to utility (I come to work and find a flour bin left open -useless and abhorrent to simply berate endlessly- is it enough to say ‘you can remember next time!) respect for one’s work is not only kind, but a moment of harshness is not a harsh person (within anger exists purpose -one’s purpose is fucking- through purpose can anger become passion -one turns to depression/hatred/refinement/joy- what if one’s purpose is to love?) anger turned upon one-self suppresses, whether that self is inner or outer.


Do as you will, this does not mean to act without regard for consequence, it means to act without attempting to remove one-self -under love- to act in intimate connection to the action, so one sees themselves in the act (we rarely fail to see personal faults, instead removing awareness by the small lie -losing sight of the fault for the sliver- the possibility of why replaces the reality) if one loses themselves in anger -for another/themselves/environment/etc.- do as you will, will under love without escape.


Not to escape the decadence through ignorant bliss, but to recognize the decay, to go under and experience as one moves through (through their hel realm, the land in which they would die, to feel more comfortable) no longer ‘I sometime get really mad, but it’s not that bad/etc.’ instead seeking the core of that hydra.


When that core is lifted into the light -as one becomes aware of themselves- can the heads fade in strength, what is the change that changes nothing, in the decay of apathy/terror/hatred (can depression be one’s passion, can comfort with personal joys be apathy, can one’s pride fuel blind hatred?) that which would overcome, it becomes horrific tragedy -with the cynical knowledge that integrity could make it comedy- but can you face what you truly honor?


I apologize for this work, as I can only mislead, but I do not seek to build within what is, I must create a universal whole (I was a fool, and begged for that which none wish, but what is the essential beyond good and evil?) how does one take Ramses, and find the essence beyond the decadence, should one slay the hydras head -it was evil- truly!


To finish, the point of cycles in such a thing as physics, this is to create a pre-conception, for our limits determine what is seen (to come at a core truth from a perspective, one that simply shifts the possible, in this one creates originality) what the perspective is does not matter -so much as integrity- to deepen realization of truth, before whatever end may come.


I apologize for this work, for my own lack of character, but today was the first resistance, perhaps the tragic may become comedy -whatever end comes- I hope that I twist about a perspective, that is truly depth (regardless of how many ever read this, it means that my own failed experiment reflects, a global movement of millennia coming to fruition) if only the act of thinking in a different way, I never sought to question what brilliance exists -long before and after me.-.


Reading reveals -it is very nearly my simple life!- I know nothing unknown for millennia, but this race deserves better (mostly I hope I am insane, that what I feel is not truly the noos, for this race deserves far better) it deserves better than to see the shallow, without ever seeing the radiance, my apologies for ignoring that radiance, that is the true revealing of my deep ignorance.


Thank you for your time, I wish for the will to make the crossing, so that this might have real worth, peace.

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